Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
