You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I love you. Go after that dick
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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