My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
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