the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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