Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize