The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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