he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
