White coat. Heels.
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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