People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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