he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
it was like eating out sand paper
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
