if you like me you must not know who I am
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize