her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
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