I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
