i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Randomize