lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
