no, he came in my armpit
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
