oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
