The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
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