erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
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