She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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