Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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