Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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