You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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