how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize