I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Randomize
