Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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