just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
