I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
