I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
When did we convert life to cartoon?
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
