My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Randomize
