they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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