eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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