Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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