His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
