Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
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