his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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