____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize