Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Randomize
