Fuck appropriateness.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Randomize