Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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