I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
