Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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