Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
even my farts smell like vagina
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Randomize
