Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Fuck appropriateness.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Randomize