4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
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