okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Randomize
