You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Randomize