I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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