I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Come see our sink grown plant.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
