what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
my nose is crying tears of wow.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Randomize
