What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
there was a trapeze. enough said
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
